Sunday, October 17, 2010

Where From and Where To !!

The 'Notion' of "Pujo-Merriment" ends for this year. The last four days were spent amidst certain issues that worried me, certain gathering where i laughed to welcome the dawn and certain incidents that got etched in those dark memory chambers. 'Pleasurable' it was in its own way. Amidst friends and laughter many were remembered and missed till the dream of a faraway bejeweled city trampled the silence of the night. 'She' leaving for abode wrenches my heart even today. Logical explanation strongly proclaims that the 'reason to leave' is to 'return soon'. The idols with which i shared my deepest secrets and to whom i murmured my prayers will again sink in the murkiness of the monotonous fight to Survive.

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I again read Love Story, Heidi and Jungle Book. This time while i held these books and moved my eyes through the soft words,  the greyness of aging or the speed of raging towards an uncertain future stared hard. The glaring truth of having strained relationship with 'Innocence' and leaving the sense of excitement of being able to relate with the protagonists far behind, posed question about why can't these pieces be enjoyed with the same enthusiasm as was possible ten or fifteen years back?! As an answer I will go back to keep these books in my school library, where i got acquainted with the most enjoyable music of life... 'the hushed humming of my classmates' and then will go and stand by the side of the lake where the setting sun imparts the most vibrant hue to welcome the bright moon and the twinkling stars. I will leave these books on the grass by that lake where open eyed dreams knew what a soul mate is.

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Twelve years: left Daltonganj. A small, uncivilized, barbaric town in Jharkhand. Yes, the adjectives perfectly define the place, but sadly not as per my belief. How can I?! The hot afternoon loo taught me that 'unbearable' is just a word, everything has a soothing presence about itself. Had it not been so hot, could i have ever known what fun it was to sit with cousins and play tell-a-tale under the staircase! The chilly winter breeze silenced me with its gift when questioned about its pinch on the bare skin. It whispered in my ear that had it been not the way it is,how would i have enjoyed the bliss of those morning dew. The swelled up river Koel never stood by me and always encouraged me to flow along with.

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5 comments:

AppuApe said...

Don't get me wrong... but it sounds like u r feeling the pinch ever so often... may be you should head back to these places... and realise... "its home"
Further more you are trying painstakingly to ward these emotions and sweeping them under the carpet.

:) - Memories ever so powerful...
Memories... ever so magnetic...
memories... worth giving in to!!

Go back to 'em!!

Supriya Dutta said...

u r correct..may be..i understand what u say... but i somehow love writing on this line...it seems i can express in the best way possible when i am writing or talking about the by-gone times..it's so clear..it happened and it makes easy for me to describe it... i reallly really love writing about what is gone... nagging or cribbing i am sure it appear to the readers. :P, but when i am writing i enjoy it to the core... :)

sarmistha said...

i absolutely agree with u supu..i feel the same when I'm writing something about by gone times or relationships or moments...loved this post...

Supriya Dutta said...

hehehehe...thankyouu thankyouu.. :)

Nodi said...

Whenever i read these sort of texts i feel the importance of the eterenal prefix 're' which comes before words like incarnation, visit and every worthwhile word (remember, being the most significant in this case).This is the one which i loved most so far, as you have a feeling akin to this oldboy who has spent a considerable part of his childhood in a small town in West Midnapur

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