Showing posts with label Nostalgia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Nostalgia. Show all posts

Sunday, December 29, 2013

Will Sparkle Forever!

A sudden whiff of a strange weird thought. But think of it, it’s some thing that affects each one of us everyday in someway or the other – the sense of Loss – Death. A term that takes away from us something very dear, very familiar.

This struck me very distinctly with the news of Farooque Shaikh passing away. Instant reaction, must be someone I don’t know. A second reaction, how? A third and so on and so forth as news kept coming and confirming that it was this actor, whom we always praised both as an actor and a person, but never spoke of it so verbally as we are doing now. Later, i also thought about his family. What the family must be going through. A healthy, hearty person goes to Dubai for a concert, with his family, and a few days later the family returns without him. It’s scary, incomprehensible.


While mulling over the news, I started to think about him in terms of what he did best and was widely known for, Acting. I distinctly remember watching him first in ‘Katha’, which was aired on Doordarshan. To which, I remember my aunt’s reaction to Farooque Shaikh’s character – ‘issh, erom lok hoyeche keno? Onno shob chobi te ki bhalo bhalo paat kore’ (why is he playing such a character, he is such a nice person in all other films.) She was not liking the fact that Farooque Shaikh, an actor with an established image of a next door, well-behaved neighbour, someone who would never go wrong by principle & choice, was playing such a character. This, I’m saying gauging the impact that reel has on real life.

Taking the point from here, I also thought of many such artists who we have known through our parents; and to sit and reflect back, most of them died in the past 4-5 years. People whom we knew and grew up to only to admire & respect, leaves all of a sudden, and that struck.

There were these set of artists about whom my father would selflessly and forcefully pitch for. They were the icons he grew up with. He, given the bleakest opportunity would praise and show his fondness and respect for Dilip Kumar, Raj Kapoor & Dev Anand over Amitabh Bachchan and Sashi Kapoor, Sachin Dev Burman over Rahul Dev Burman, Md. Rafi & Mukesh over Kishore Kumar and so on and so forth. With progress of time and era, even the lesser preferred artists in the above equation were GOD when compared to the ilk of the modern day artists, who were, the Khans, the Maliks, the Sanus & so on. But, keeping judgement aside, our choice and taste are influenced by the contemporaries, which, as we grow keep changing and evolving to eventually die down.

I’m saying all this because of the number of deaths we have heard in the last five years. We have heard, known and learnt about them from our previous generation, they actually belonged to that generation. Still, we relate to them so much that news of death does leave in us a sense, a realization of irreplaceable, irreparable loss. In that case, how do our parents feel about these losses? What’s the magnitude of void that they experience? How difficult is it for them to hear and accept such news? Do these news create in them a sense of despair and helplessness of having to face an inescapable truth – sooner or later! Do they long to go back to the times when only the characters died but the players evolved successful!

Sooner or later, such a day would dawn on us too. We would wake up to hear that our screen icons are no more. They have left back only reels of memory and would never ever play a character whom we would get a chance to despise or admire. How will we deal with that?

Everything cannot be  put in words, but the best that one can do is to live the moment, ease out, be content, do good and make merry – for Life, is not what you can plan.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

VIBGYOR

Holi from my childhood days are something i envy today, needless to mention there are a line up of many miore such days.

On this day then i used to wake up early in the morning and hunted out that old and withered frilled white frock. Morning was about gulping some interesting breakfast. Soon after, i used to run down to the "laal-bari" to join my cousins for the occassion. All gathered with our choice of colors, splashes of colors on the frock, all merry and tireless, the morning went in a jiffy. Evenings were equally interesting with parents joining the gang with "abir". Abir smelt air and the evening sky colored looked brighter with the brightest of colors.

Years went by and the days changed, went to Hazaribagh.  Celebration was equally exciting but lacked the grandeur. Absence of 9 cousins to play Holi with, the number came down to 1, and i still remember something from those days. A mean gesture rather. Amidst examinations, I was sitting sad. He came up with his palms painted in green and smeared the color on my face from behind, pissed, i didnt enjoy it. I went crazy and  screamed at him, went and washed my face rite away...i still regret that behaviour of mine. With an opportunity anytime in future, i would take it all in mirth. Promise :)

Then days were brighter and the boundaries opened beyond the gathering of 9 cousins. I was a hosteller at the Banaras Hindhu University. Hundreds of girls of more or less the same age..but that's the age where people are serious about their being seniors and juniors than any other thing under the sun, but Holi was one leveler. On this day there were no restrictions and orders took a back seat. The water reservoir under the fountain was filled with water and the color of the water changed in seconds, after playing colors for hours, amidst the examination months, we were treated with special lunch. It was fun..Undoubtedly

Years older. Jadavpur University. Not much to be said, but colors were played more on the day before the occassion than on the day.

Since then, only a year or two, i celebrated Holi, but honestly not as heartily. Sometime later, it was on Holi, i.went to a friend's place, while returning a girl on the road sprayed color on me, i was more than happy, i was reminded of my frilled frocks.

Then, Days started shedding off colors. Nevertheless, with all fun and memories, this day brings in a sign of hope, a dream of coloring the world in our own bright way.

HAPPY HOLI.. :)

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Where From and Where To !!

The 'Notion' of "Pujo-Merriment" ends for this year. The last four days were spent amidst certain issues that worried me, certain gathering where i laughed to welcome the dawn and certain incidents that got etched in those dark memory chambers. 'Pleasurable' it was in its own way. Amidst friends and laughter many were remembered and missed till the dream of a faraway bejeweled city trampled the silence of the night. 'She' leaving for abode wrenches my heart even today. Logical explanation strongly proclaims that the 'reason to leave' is to 'return soon'. The idols with which i shared my deepest secrets and to whom i murmured my prayers will again sink in the murkiness of the monotonous fight to Survive.

********************

I again read Love Story, Heidi and Jungle Book. This time while i held these books and moved my eyes through the soft words,  the greyness of aging or the speed of raging towards an uncertain future stared hard. The glaring truth of having strained relationship with 'Innocence' and leaving the sense of excitement of being able to relate with the protagonists far behind, posed question about why can't these pieces be enjoyed with the same enthusiasm as was possible ten or fifteen years back?! As an answer I will go back to keep these books in my school library, where i got acquainted with the most enjoyable music of life... 'the hushed humming of my classmates' and then will go and stand by the side of the lake where the setting sun imparts the most vibrant hue to welcome the bright moon and the twinkling stars. I will leave these books on the grass by that lake where open eyed dreams knew what a soul mate is.

**********************

Twelve years: left Daltonganj. A small, uncivilized, barbaric town in Jharkhand. Yes, the adjectives perfectly define the place, but sadly not as per my belief. How can I?! The hot afternoon loo taught me that 'unbearable' is just a word, everything has a soothing presence about itself. Had it not been so hot, could i have ever known what fun it was to sit with cousins and play tell-a-tale under the staircase! The chilly winter breeze silenced me with its gift when questioned about its pinch on the bare skin. It whispered in my ear that had it been not the way it is,how would i have enjoyed the bliss of those morning dew. The swelled up river Koel never stood by me and always encouraged me to flow along with.

**********************

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Blurred Vision

..and you HAVE to say  this and you turn around with that ‘gossip’ urge just to realize, its a different office, different environment, different people and then you turn to the screen and log on to g-chat and see that green blob beside the name with whom you wanted to share it..but the excitement-of-the-moment-and-matter is gone.

...and you want to sip some coffee and chat and laugh it out loud and bitch and after you have dialled, the phone rings and you realize the geographical distance between, but then you continue to talk some irrelevant stuff while trying to fight the distance.

...and you have that ‘blank expression’ on your face after coming out of the theatre, and on gauging the ‘positive’ or ‘negative’ of the expression you miss words like ‘and this awesomeness calls for a celebration’.. or ‘ we really need to treat ourselves for going through such a pain’... and in either cases you head to one of your favourite places on earth or its just Someplace Else.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

It's all in the Blood

Past: Born and brought up in a joint family and in a place which was (in fact, is still)deprived of all the blessing and curse of a city...


Present: Trying to make a living in this ever changing and fleeting moments of a faster life, trying to match steps with all running on one of those tracks.


Reaction: I feel so good and proud, first that i have a treasure of such a serene, soothing childhood.
Second, Atleast i am getting to know and learn the art to face and fight the ever intruding changes to make a mark somewhere, if no where atleast to myself.


ok..from here i take a different route altogether. As it is, people in every walk of life get to meet people and trust me on this when i say, each and every one leaves a mark on your dairy in one way or the other..well that is on a bigger canvas, on a smaller canvas and from what i have heard about myself from different people and then when i think from where did i acquire all these traits..i make a note of these people who come to my mind..


In context to the past and present:


Acquired from Grandfather: Ability to remember dates. (birthday, anniversaries and just a combination of a day and month...) but that doesn't mean i scored well in History as a student.
Past: Remembered birthdays and anniversaries of all persons alive or dead in the family and of the over-extended family.
Present: I remember dates and days on the basis of my attendance in the office, if i am at the office, it means its a weekday, if not it means a weekend.


Acquired from Grandmother: The "Laughter"
Past: People could locate me anywhere from that loud giggling laughter and therefore my cousins never wanted me to be there in the team while playing "Hide and Seek".
Present: The "Laughter" still intact...at times to forget the stress and at times to be in that most important "i am still in sync". (basically a self consolatory thing)


Acquired from father: "Lost in my own world"
Past: Lost in my own world, i ended up doing several positive and productive things, which included "study". I never scored less than an 95% till std. VII.
Present: Which i think started may be after VII std., i end up thinking what and what not. but no positive result to it, often "lost in my own world" means a "Blank-head".


Acquired from mother: Hand-writing
Past: Till std. X, if not for anything i was the uncontested student when it came to hand-writing. Each and every teacher knew me and still remember me for my hand-writng.
Present: Thankyou Microsoft Office, you have left me with no option. Handwriting now means making the monthly grocery list...if someone else carries the list to the shop, they end up buying only half of the things mentioned in the list.


Acquired from Mejo-kaka(uncle): Spic and span
Past: If for anything, no one could raise finger at me for an untidy room, study table, dress..whatever
Present: Cleaning house is a weekly affair now.


Acquired from Sejo-kaka: Quiet and Calm
Past: Apart from the "laughter" if i was made to sit somewhere, one can find me in the same place even after hours. No screaming and shouting-but yes, this was an early childhood trait, it changed over the years. :D
Present: Ask me to sit in a place and blink...i am gone.. :D


Acquired from Choto-kaka: May be the "vocal-chord"
Past: I used to sing for myself when i was not sleepy and then gradually the song stopped and everybody knew i was in my dream land.
Present: I think my memory does a better job of remembering songs...i dnt know if at all my vocal-chord will do any more justice to music.


Well, these are 1 trait from each family members which came to my mind while typing...and all the aunts, may be i dnt have a blood tie with you poeple but you people were always there and have taught me things which my mother might have not succeeded in doing alone to this stubborn girl.


Thank you all for that wonderful childhood i have had.


Not that evrything was good in the past and everything is dark at present...but this was just like a snippet how life has changed and you know, past always looks better in yearn for a brighter future..naa!!!

Friday, May 15, 2009

Those Sunday Afternoon

Another Friday and then weekend...a Hurray....Saturday and Sunday....wow...two days...48 hours...no routine....be as you want to be....do what you want to do....

Today all of a sudden, memories of by-gone saturdays and sundays came to my mind....I was born and brought up in Daltonganj, Palamau, now in Jharkhand. A land to which bengalis (west-Bengal) can well relate to. The *(in)famous jungles (Betla Forest), pleasant weather, sparkling river(Koel), the red, sticky mud, scent of the mohua trees and flowers, beautiful sceneries and all that which nature could bestow to make a land look like a Queen.

Sundays till 2000 :-

We (cousins) used to wait for the sundays impatiently, the weekdays didn't pass by as it passes by today, saturdays never appeared in a blink after the routined home-office journeys from mondays to fridays. Saturdays, although, we had our "half-day" at school but that heightened the exitement for the weekend sojourn that started there-after.

Back from school at around 11, and during the summer, our afternoon activities didn't leave a single green mangoes on the trees. Some tried plucking mangoes by throwing stones and some technically superior mates used "Gulti" to get a sure shot at the desired target. For people who belonged to my category, plucking mangoes was easier as we could afford to select the most "fruit-full" branch of the tree, and therefore, choosing and getting the best among the lot was just about taking the risk to climb safe and thereafter the descending from the tree with bruised legs were not much to ponder over. We had a loyal company in this venture, "Jimmy" who would guard each tree from any tresspassers (sabji-waali, gowala to be specific) all round the week. The task of collecting the mangoes and then distributing among some younger cousins (cousins who were too small to climb or make a shot but stood under the tree with unfailing eagerness and enthusiasm) was more of a "responsible and elderly task". The mangoes were kept in the jhoori and would be left peaceful for the next day "EVENT".

The next day event would start in the late afternoon after having the dleicious "MANGSHO_BHAAT" for lunch and thereafter when parents and all elder members of the family drooled in the ecstacy of a summer afternoon nap, we cousins would take the charge of the "Ranna-ghor (kitchen) and the "Bhanrar-ghor"(store). The elder cousins took the task of peeling and cutting the mangoes and the younger ran to and fro the ranna ghor and bhnarar ghor to bring in the ingredients to prepare the most awaited finger-licking mango preparation. Ingredients to be brought in to prepare the juiciest of "aam-er chaat" included salt, red-chilly powder, Turmeric powder, tamarind (paste) and all that to make the preparation tasty and mouth-watering.

It was almost 4 by the time our Mango-chatka session got over and then we would sit near the main door under the stair and keep our ears open to a sound which yelled "KUUUUUUULFIIIIIIII Malai"....moment we heard this voice, all with our gathered pocket money, (which was a maximum of 20 rs. gathered from 7 cousins.) we would silently open the door and call the Kulfi-chacha. 20 rs. would get us 4 kulfis as big as the largest cornetto that we get today. The Kulfi-mania was not supposed to be carried on for long as we did this hiddenly. (except for a few days when all the family members would get up to treat themself with one, that was undoubtedly a party affair with 15 members smacking the huge KULFI).

Then at around 5.30-6 was the most awaited and dependent affair. we used to sit hurled in the garden, below the favourite "Gulab-khas" mango tree as it had a bench under it, or some smarter fellow would just run to help "dadabhai or chorda" clean the PRIDE of the town, "A Hoodless Left-hand drive Jeep". The expression on each one of our face while sitting under the tree, was so innocent and a smile so priceless that anyone would die for. At that moment if chorda or dadabhai would have asked us to jump into a well...me think, we would have done so....Needless to say, ALL this for a trip to the "Betla Forest". A 20 km. (25 mins.ride- for the winding and pebbeled road) long ride, would take us to that paradise and then half an hour of pure fun with the monkeys, deer, peacocks, elephants and if luckier, would get an hour long elephant ride into the deep and dark forest with a halogen held overhead.

Ride back home, on the way, chorda/dadabhai would treat us with gorom jilipi and singara at their favourite Chianki bus-stop and then carry a plastic or two of singara and jilipi for the rest of the family members.

The days ended and we slipped into the dream destination only to reluctantly open our eyes in the morning to wait for the week to pass by and again the SATURDAY and SUNDAY to come fast.

*(in)famous jungles (Betla Forest): I say so because now it is really risky to visit the jungle after the sun set. children there no more get a chance to visit the paradise so frequently. the place is unsafe for both the localites and the tourists after a certain time of the day.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Shades

soru r soru nei, or gonf er sathe dari o hoyeche, nadu ekhon naduer hoye geche-or o dari hoyeche, utsav er chosma-r frame ebong phone palte geche, amar kopal bodhoy choto hoye geche, jhola r kaner duul ta ekhono ache bakshobondi....r gotor ta berei choleche.......

Friday, January 2, 2009

Mumbai Chapter ends..

with a new dawn ...i bid adieu to a chapter which i cherished to the core ....

hey...will miss u all....will miss this place, this city...everything....
....thanks axiom, thanks everybody, thank you mumbai....

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Rendezvous with the Queen


May b only a few days to experience the grandeur, the royal majesty of "Her Highness"....well if i can start with quite chronologically, then:

1) Dadar station looked like some station on howrah-bardhaman main line. Bandra sea-shore looked awesome with sunlight gleaming on the silver water.

2) A ride on the famous "Mumbai-Taxi"..a fiat..and then on an auto, which is famous for the meter, watever it reads the commuter has to pay a rupee less...:D.

4) An afternoon in Mumbai...a huge city...HUGE.......but the suburbs look more like some small industrial town and complete in itself. Met Shivek - we were neighbours in that small and warm town, were classmate...after 10 years. First night in Mumbai.....the cold guesthouse....the city didnt sleep though.....

5) First ride in an auto...all alone...went to golu's place....ohh...u can travel a distance with 2o bucks in hand......they said Mumbai is a costly city!!!!!!well..more to c....

6) The reason for a step here and there in this city.... Axiom Education: shouldn't have peeped inside the glitzy curtains....knew something ...which i shldnt have had known then....neways.....but they said...mumbai people r not helpful.....they are snob.....:O:O(misconception and rumour pre-exists human)

7) The days went by....Juhu, Bandstand, Versova, Mud island, Andheri (W), Santa cruz....

8) Food still remains a problem....all the restaurants here serve drinks....i am still to experience.... Hey the "Mumbai lifeline" on weekends are just fine ....well, on weekdays they appear rowdy even to the daily passengers.....come on man..u cannot always look for loopholes....

9) More of you....

10) All the restaurants here serve drinks...mumbai people around make your life easier.....they rock......

11) COLABA, GATEWAY OF INDIA, THE TAJ PALACE HOTEL, THE LEOPALD CAFE, THE RESERVE BANK OF INDIA, THE MUMBAI HIGHCOURT, THE WESTERN RAILWAY HEAD QUARTER, HUTATMA CHOWK...............in Mumbai.....as in the part of the city where i am staying....is it????? the same city????u r not lying rite!!!hey Gorgeous......elegant old lady.....i am loving you.....i am in love.....they say...MUMBAI MERI JAAN!!!!!!!!they say it rite.......

12) Love you ...

13) Hey i looked back .......i think i heard my name.........u gave me all that i needed.....but "HOME-calling"..."Kolkata".

14) I dont know..if ever.....but i wish today.......may be once again....sometime.....may b....but definitely once .... if only once.......i kneel down to your honour

15) Love you....Miss u, i will not..... will be with you.....you will be with me.....

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Unwrapped Emotions....


may be again i have a reason to be....i really dont know "what"!!!!!!!..ok..write....neways...chuck it.....wat i feel....

Life teaches us numerous lessons which are either followed or are just kept aside...

"A good-bye with a smile"...is the worst lesson of all that "Life" teaches......

I mean we can just be straight and up right while expressing some emotions which are equally vital as the lessons....!!!!!!! ...

hey!!!!!?????

Thursday, December 11, 2008

It Rained

Like many other posts..without any reason, base, logic or anything....this practise might describe me......if observed...a creature marching on the earth, without a radar...aimlessly, baselessly, illogically.....well...not to continue on that line...


This time i am trying to jot down memories associated with songs....i am not trying to start in any chronological order, rather as it comes to my jagged memory.


Rite at this point of time, i am listening to songs of Metro and Jhoom Barabar Jhoom, (wat did you say???, u expected something very different from this collection???.....then i must say, u have stepped on to a wrong blog..this might not be your place...i am sure u will find greener pastures around..:-D)


Well, the songs from these two films, reminds me every act, weird act, i performed in the show-house called "Compare Infobase"...without fail i still say....the place definitely had the charm to woo many if not all...i was among "many" of them.


"In-dino dil mera" and "bol na halke halke" reminds me of those showers, which stood as a transparent curtains between me standing on the verandah and those distant green scape on one side and those concrete structures on the other side, just to mention one among the numerous shots that pass my memory scape within seconds, as soon as any of these two songs start.


The sessions at Xrong, i remember i heard JBJ's songs, for the first time. i remember the capris fitting me fine, the peach colored t-shirt just highlighting the contours of my body as those were, the long tresses, wet and smelling sweet becuase of that newly discovered shampoo and the fragrance that i always wore till then....

The walk from 95, southern avenue to Deshapriya park, Rahul's car waiting in front of the National High School, me walking towards the school, Debolina beside me...and then discovering the other two sitting in the car, unlike "all-drenched" debolina and me, they were dry as a date and were looking as proper as one can manage to look for some highly anticipated interview call after ages.

"In dino dil mera" also reminds me - loosing my favorite "Osho Chappal"...well, i have fetish for objects which helps me feel "lighter" ...;-D, the same osho chappal i wore to XRONG, the time i heard JBJ's music. well and then the other two sitting in Rahul's car didnt even notice that i was on my way to office, without any "footwear..and yes...i mean it...

This song also reminds me of the "special lift" in pisi's car...though at that point of time neither of us knew each other....moment i just entered with my soiled feet , i could hear the song...

Man, i took this song as a jinxed one in my life...but....yes..as always i think i was wrong.

the post to be continued..as per the delivery from the above jagged memory,...:D:D

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Winters in Daltonganj

Want to go to Daltonganj.....anytime between Dec.15 to Jan.15. why...????? Well....

1) Its my home town.....Duh

2) Want to appreciate the beauty of Nature, when tempearture is falling down to some 2 and 1 degree celsius..(well such a fall in temperature can also be experienced in many other towns and cities in India, but along with the natural beauty, the ever rising pollution level alomost comes free in this era of globalisation.)

3) I haven't experienced such a beauty in almost five years now.

4) Sudden gusts of rain...when the temperature is some 3 degree celsius.

5) Waking up in the morning which looks like evening because of mist and fog.

6) Leisurely stroll ...no not a stroll...in the afternoon, cycling through those dingy gullies and relatively broad streets where everybody looks at you as if they know you, but fails to figure at a go....and hence looks at you perplexed..and you often pass by...

7) Stroll along the riverside in the evening...like at around 4-4.30 p.m.

8) A sudden power cut on those full moon nights when you are sitting all covered in your woollens and under a blanket.

i mean..all the above experience combined...you can just afford to die after such a bliss.....

Friday, November 28, 2008

Rahul


Few things never change.....even today, Rahul reaches Deshapriya Park at 8.15.....(source:.Reliable...My sincere thanks to the reliable source.)

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Hothat..




....J.U r jonne mon kharap korlo...tai naam likhbo..jaader ghire oi duniya ta chilo.....jekhane ei shiit kaal gulo milan da e bose kete jeto.......chenchamichi, golpo, gujob, pechone laga, haansi, thatta, chote jawa...ei sob miliyei din gulo kete gechilo....

Nnaam gulo likhlam...britha chesta....thik parlam na.........

Aaaj dingulo ektu dhoyate hoye geche.....kintu sob sriti r modhye ke jaane keno oi din gulo konodin jhapsate hoyni...ekhono hoyni...hobe kina janina...hoyto hobe na.......

Ekhono mone pore....oi canteen er samne bose hoyto kono du jon mile ekta cha er bhaare..ekta choto golpo aar haansa haansi diye shuru hoto..tarpor ek-ek kore kotha theke sobai juute jeto.....diner seshe......jotla ta vivekanda hall er samne giye jomto.....bela goriye dupur, bikel periye sondhe..raat.....tokhun abar oi 8B morer chaaer dokan e..aarekta jomayet.....ei jomayet e university r jabotiyo chele meye thakto...jaara auto r line e dariye bari ferar ekta chesta korto....abar line theke beriye,....aabr cha khete khete, oi mathar opor rajnoitik bigyapon gulo dekhe, prochondo uttejito hoye, bhaar er por bhaar cha kheye..aaro 1, 1 1/2 ghonta deri hoye jawa....amar p.g. te dhukte aaro kichu ghontar deri.....arekta mithye kotha...ekebaare sottyi r moto kore......tarpore room e dhukei....soma r pechone lege...o ghumole or ghum bhangiye..nije kaan e radio ta chepe sei fyal fyal kore takiye thakte thakte ghumiye pora....:D:D:D

sei sokal er jotla taaye...english, ecomoncs, comparative literature, film studies er lokjon to thekei thakto....baki bodhoy edik odik theke aaro kichu lok juute jeto......sob mile jeto.....oneke oneker naam jaanto na...kintu tabole golper beg e konodino seta badhar shristi koreni...

mone pore.....baaje boka, shudhu boke jawa, maane-bihin boka......o-karone-karone haansi, loker pechone lege ekta odbhut aaram, moja.., lok ke deke deke khorak kora, tarpor cigg kinba cha ta onner naame milan daar theke newa....

hothat mone hoye..hoyto onno duniyar kotha ............bodhoi swopnoi mone hobe aaro kichu bochor baade......

Monday, November 24, 2008

Lost, i am


Mumbai, at times looks good, at times ...no not sad, not depressing...but u know the city is so huge, my mortal being just fail to get the links to its over the centuries existence. . ..The grandeur of the city with my mere attempts to know it, fails to strike a balance in between. I am often left to wander "no-where" after travelling a distance of say some 30 kilometers over a span of two hours.

Well, i dnt complain, the city allure thousands with such vastness of its own and by which it definitely swears to the upcoming trend of lifestyle and living.

Only that i get lost ...i g haywire...i fail to find an identity of my own while moving.....

Monday, November 17, 2008

Mumbai is looking Good

A very frank and a rude statement i will make....

I am enjoying Bunny's and Golu's company to the fullest here in Mumbai for the undermentioned reasons....(At times one of my roommate can also be counted here in the list):

1) They are the best with whom i can be myself because they are at comfort being themselves.

2) I can enjoy the way I want to because we have a similar definitions and idea of enjoying.

3)Going out with them doesnt mean i will have to just move around, they are as good foodie as i am ( if not, then loves drinking) and therefore i enjoy eating and drinking with them no matter where it is.

4) Not only that they try not to be formal, they are not formal because they cannot be formal, atleast with me.

For other's, here in Mumbai, you people either try to be very formal with me or over friendly. I hate both the attitudes.

Another One..:D


U can afford to be nostalgic when :

1) You are sitting with some sensible old pals, by "sensible" i mean some who has faced the same situation in the same way as you have faced it, (as in moving out of home town and stuff like that or from that cozy comfort zone of the past, to be precise... but then when u say that, everyone claims to have a rugged present topography ....so plain and simple....People whom you think will understand and can contribute or to the least will be a good listener to the topic or act of being nostalgic.

2) You are sitting with the same guys boozing and smoking on the terrace on an October night under starry sky say after an appraisal or just the night before when you all are going on a 10 days trip to some hilly regions.

3) You are travelling, specifically in a train and heading towards the place you love... for anything, as in you are travelling where in you are expecting fun and you are just happy about going to the concerned place.

4) You have something where you can jot down your memories.

5) you are alone because you are happy or you are happy that you are alone.

Look for the above conditions, you can afford to be nostalgic because that wont make you cry, instead, it will give you an opportunity to feel good about your past and therefore trying to make a present and a future of which you can be nostalgic about in the distant future.

Well, end of this crap...i thought this way....therefore......you see.. i had something where i jotted it down....:D:D:D:D

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

To You


Had i been in kolkata i am not sure whether i would have gone to the 14th Kolkata International Film Festival or not. But irrespective of that, now that i am not in kolkata, i am missing the event, i will miss the event and i will keep missing it for reasons plenty. I will miss it for the next seven days, may b till the next year, may be anytime till amnesia hits me.

This event reminds me cliched (ly) of an opportunity to watch films....goes without saying, but a number of other activities that used to keep me really busy - i will be missing those.

I will be missing those poke that i got for not making it to one of the good films of the festival, poke for just sitting idle when all were too enthusiastic to watch a certain screening, poke at the moment when realization has dawned on all others that they have also missed a film just because of the contagious lethargy.

I will be missing end number of people whom i met only during those seven days. I will be missing just a "hi" from someone whom i had met years back and then a sudden pleasure of meeting them again, may be just for a fleeting minute if not second. I will be missing the center seat in the "Nandan Complex", where neither you nor any one can miss each other's presence, i will be missing those "just-sit-beside" conversation and eventually ending up being another prominent acquaintance in each other's list.

I will be missing moving out of a hall, creeping, on not liking the film. I will be missing saying a lie to someone about a film which i havent watched on a positive review about the same hitting my ear. I will be missing saying a lie about watching a film from the start to the end, in which i have actually slept through the whole film.

I will be missing those last shows and then waiting for a taxi for just an hour, may b it was nt about getting a taxi it was just about spending another hour discussing about the day and the days to come.

I will miss the cold breeze, i will miss the chill of the halls, specially Rabindra sadan and Shishir Mancha.

I will be missing u all, i will be missing it all....but i think i will like missing it for that will give me sense of how i enjoyed "Something", which i never realised.

Saturday, November 8, 2008

The surname game


Changes in these surnames:

1) Duttaray --> Chakraborty

2) Mohanty -->Parija

3) Hatimuria --> (wld b..) dnt know

4) Mukherjee --> Gupta

5) Sengupta --> NO IDEA

Well, as inference can be easily drawn, or if not, the above mentioned surnames (the first ones) were all tagged to the persons who were my "Friends".

Well, the first three just changed, leaving not much impacts on my existence. The surnames were rolled in and rolled out just as the role of those people in my life..nothing great.....came in and went away....were there till my eyes could see them....were out of my mind moment they were not seen.......so may be i will just refer them to as roommates that they were for 1 year and the contact game was intact till the change in surname.

Well, the change of the 4th on the list will definitely have a greater impact on my life in compared to in any other surname getting changed in this world.

Mukherjee, Soma Mukherjee to Soma Gupta, As her husband's Souvik Gupta....

-- I know her: since circa 2000
-- Roommate: 2000-2002, again 2003-2005.....4 years.
-- Stayed in the same city : 2000-2008.

Yyes, thats the number. 8 years of togetherness, friendship, hatred, love, disgust, well being, pleasure, displeasure and all emptions that a person can have in a span of 8 years, per se, every emotions were exchanged and were noted on each other's existence.

Ok...she stood witness to all my highs and lows....she knew better than me when i was happy, she knew better than my parents when i was sad, she knew better than anyone, when i was not in the right mood. May be, one get to know a person better than anyone else when they have to spend 24/7 with the person under the same roof.

Well, we had to put up at different places, during the later years as per the call of the situation and time. (May be that was just an epilogue to the time coming..).

Our rendezvous or should i say meetings or dont know wat xactly, was carried on holidays, sundays, saturdays, even if not regularly, yes, sporadically. One and some more things for sure, we knew if there was no one we were just a call away from each other. We knew if we dnt have any plans to spend the day, we cn just call up and plan out somethig which will definitely make the day more interesting than any other days. We knew, we wanted to watch a movie at the night show and if we dnt get a conveyance after the show gets over....we cn walk down the lane or any distance just with the craps, silly laughters and what not.....We knew we can laugh at the silliest things for hours, we knew we can discuss the most serious things in life, that we considered serious enough, fr hours, we knew we can wake up wither of us no matter how deep sleep we r in.

But having said all that...it doesnt mean..we never fought, we never got tired of each other, at times we wanted "Not to be with each other"....and the reunion was never a reunion, the hatred or the disgust didnt change just in a second.........we hated each other for the silliest reason, we were irritated on each other just because we had no one around to vent that irritation out....yes.."Punch Bag" they call it......no regrets for the fights, no tears for the times we werent together. .....we tolerated each other's oddities as it were....no complains......... we enjoyed just the way we were with each other.

Now if i sit to think...wat about those loud laughters while watching a movie? Wat about those fridays, saturdays and sundays..when we knew we were definitely there to be with each other, willingly or unwillingly??!! Wat about those night shows, which when ended saw us laughing for getting no conveyance way back home? Wat about those sudden mood swings or irritations when i knew you were there where i can vent out all and all would just set in perfectly with an equal jitter from the other side......no idea......

Well, things changes, circumstances changes and people always find their ways out.....certainly i will, may be with your help.......

......And for the change in the 4th surname ....i really have no idea as to what will happen.........only i can hope and wish, not to witness the effect of that change in the surname and then residing in the same city.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

I owe you......


well...to start with....still in office.....but...not feeling like working...but the urge to scribble can seldom stop one from penning or rather "keyboarding"...-(thats copyright..u c)..:D:D..... down the abstracts of life and thoughts.



Well......since the last time when i made you my confidant for many an events that my life has witnessed......i traversed a long way.....physically.......unknowingly but intentionally. Know what!!!!.....I still remember the moment when i vigorously uttered the word "YES" for a sesion in Mumbai............. Yes......i was disturbed, irritated, disheartened, disgusted for the way your appealing charm reciprocated to my love. On that note, I just happened to discard it all, to move on to a place which would satisfy my urge to know something new.



Just in a moment's blow i wanted to shut my nose to the aroma of the Nahoum's at the New Market, and on the hindsight I was clear of my conscience of holding on to that single breath till last. i wanted to shut my eyes off the sight of the setting sun against the backdrop of the majestic Howrah Bridge or the magnificent Tech-smart buildings of Saltlake. I wanted to shut my ears to the fading honks of the cars running past the Science City to reach its destination office. I didnt wanted to feel that heat and then to relax and enjoy the cool showers that the clouds showered in the months to releive people from the harsh humidity.

Moment i said yes to the city that swears by its "Aqua-Beauty".....i knew i was going to miss the smell of the flowers that were never seen blooming but made their presence felt with the aroma far away, i also knew the righthand corner of "Xrong" would be devoid of the smoke i puffed and the crude loud laughter. I knew, the stretch from 95, southern Avenue to the Deshapriya Park stoppage would not get to see one of its daily commuters. Just a blank stare at the hanging verandahs of the houses in the Lake Market would look out for that missing glance . A walk to the Deshapriya Park and a "sitting idle" gesture would just be off with a whistle that the train would blow.....i knew i was going to miss all of this with you, who witnessed all my eccentricities and absurdities to the fullest.


But know what...moment i threw myself to the unknown grasp of the majestic aura of the Beach city.....your colonial brilliance was something i was not looking at, those sights i wanted to wipe off my memory board just as the smoke touched the roof of the College Street Coffee House, just as the last sip was slrupped by some at the T3 at the Park street corner or just as the last ray of the setting sun was wiped off with a single movement of the clock's minute hands.

Well i must admit, am looking forward to the day, when i will surely get a chance to embrace your magnificence and you will embrace me for the eccentricities and activities that you will again laugh at or just think about or just move by ignoring it. I miss you for all that you are, for the mornings where i woke up to your alluring tea and coffee shops, which ranged from a road side tea stall to any Barista or Flury's. For the afternoons where you attracted me to the table with foods that defined your authenticity and originality, for the evenings where friends could just stand and say a "Hi" to have a counter puff, or just the night to end the day with some ever nostalgic melodious voices being aired on the radio.



I wish to come back and i know i will for you, your serenity, care and the powerful Love that you ushered on me, u should know i will come back to you and be game till eternity to be with you.

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